15 March 2013

2012 Ice Age

2012 Ice Age (2011)
  • Director: Travis Fort
  • Based on Book: no
  • Cast: Patrick Labyourteaux, Julie McCullough, Katie Wilson, Nick Afanasiev
  • Personal “oh yeah him/her” reaction, i.e. have seen this actor/actress in:
    • None, I haven’t seen any of them before
  • Why bought: I wonder myself. It was cheap and I’m a sucker for disaster movies
  • Seen: November 2, 2012

Another candidate for the dumbest movie ever made.  It makes Caveman (my previous dumbest ever) look positively hilarious.  At least its dumbness was intentional and funny.  This one is at times funny without meaning to be.
The story itself isn’t worse than others – volcanoes, glaciers, crushed cities, fleeing people, separated family, happy ending ( = family united, never mind the millions dead and civilization destroyed).
What makes this one so bad, well, there’s a long list:
  • Careless, stupid mistakes
    • Hekla is in Iceland, you dingbats, not Greenland
    • Have you ever seen a snowstorm?  When it snows you get piles of snow on the ground. Streets and roads actually get blocked. The puny inch of snow in this disaster blizzard is insulting to a Stockholmer like myself.
    • In one scene it’s so cold people freeze solid as they run (actually a kind of cool scene, pardon the pun) while in the next they’re running around in T-shirts, unzipped leather jackets, trainers, no hat, no gloves and pathetically whining, “It’s cold.”  Duh.
  • I’ve seen better acting in high school plays.
  • The gender stereotypes are from another century and that’s an insult to history. The father and boyfriend run the show: “do this”, “follow me”, “stay in the car”; the mother and daughter (long blonde hair, both of them) do as they’re told and whimper. Science nerd son admired science genius dad.  And people say we have gender equality in our society?  Puh-leeze!

Since I gave Caveman two stars out of a hundred I’ll give this movie a small point, say half a star because of the frozen people scene and because I stayed awake on a Friday evening.

½ * of 100

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